I really liked this outburst....Hilarious...har har

I want to thank all my friends and other unknown people who have
forwarded chain letters to me in 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, and continue to receive.

Because of your kindness:

I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out that it's good only for
removing toilet stains.

I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected
with AIDS

I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they
cause cancer.

I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to
dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill from hell with calls to
Uganda ,Singapore and Tokyo.

I also stopped drinking water outside for fear that I will get
sick from the rat shit and urine.

When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl, no matter how hot she
is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, drug me, then take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl
that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. (Poor girl! she's been 7 since 1993...)

My free Nokia phone never arrived and neither did the free passes for a
paid vacation to Disneyland.

Made some Hundred wishes before forwarding those Dalai Lama, Ganesh
Vandana, Tirupathi Balaji pics etc..

Now most of those "Wishes" are already married (to someone else)!
and m still waiting 4 that gud newz............although got some other
good news which was not good for me

You can add your own notes based on your similar experience and send
them to your friends.

If ORKUT deletes my account, it doesn't matter BUT PLEASE DON'T SEND me
"Orkut is deleting accounts: Due to sudden rush..." Otherwise I'll delete my E-Mail account!


IMPORTANT NOTE:
If you do not send this e-mail to at least 913760 people in the next 10
seconds,a bird will shit on your head today at 6:30 p.m.


Give me a break!!
"The World Is Filled WIth Foolish Ppl And Some Think They Got Talent
Too !!!"

If you ever get lost in India...

If you ever get lost in India and want to find out where you are, this is
the best way of doing just that.

Scenario 1

Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along, then a fourth and they
start arguing about who's right - you are in kolkata.

Scenario 2

Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along, sees them and walks on -
that's mumbai.

Scenario 3

Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along & tries to make peace. The
first two get together & beat him up - that's Delhi.

Scenario 4

Two guys are fighting. A crowd gathers to watch. A guy comes along and
quietly opens a chai stall - that's ahmedabad.

Scenario 5

Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes. He writes a software program to
solve the issue but the fight does not stop because of a bug in the program.
That's Bangalore ...

Scenario 6

Two guys are fighting. a crowd gathers to watch. A guy comes along and
quietly says that amma doesn't like all this nonsense. Peace comes in -
that's chennai.

Scenario 7

Two guys are fighting. Both of them take time out and call their friends on
mobile. Now 50 guys are fighting. You are in Hyderabad.

Scenario 8

Two guys are fighting. a crowd gathers to watch. Someone calls police. The
police come and lathi charge all the people crowded there. Someone throws
stones at the police. The police throw stones back at the crowd. some people
are arrested. Damages to the shops nearby. Next day, harthal and holiday
declared by government ..You are very much in Lucknow, UP!

Wedding Query........(SQL Server Stored Procedure Style)

CREATE PROCEDURE MyMarriage
@ BrideGroom Char(NotBad),
@ Bride Char(Good)


AS
BEGIN


SELECT Bride FROM india Brides
WHERE
FatherInLaw = 'Millionaire' AND
CarCount > 2 AND
HouseStatus ='TwoStoreyed' AND
BrideEduStatus='PG orAbove'
HavingBrothers='NO' AND
HavingSisters ='No' AND
AllowRelocate ='YES' AND

SELECT Gold ,Cash,Car,BankBalance FROM FatherInLaw

UPDATE MyBankAccout SET MyBal = MyBal + FatherinLawBal
UPDATE MyLocker SET MyLockerContents = MyLockerContents + FatherinLawGold

INSERT INTO MyCarShed VALUES ('BMW')


END
GO


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Then the wife writes the below query:


DROP HUSBAND